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Assalamualaikum Warahmatullah Wabarakatu
Alhamdulillah for a lovely weekend with loved ones and a day to appreciate my little Arwa Hannah. She has what can only be described as a gusto for life and is always making us laugh. She is crazy about buses and pizza and loves her grandmother to bits. Our days of appreciation are to teach our kids how to appreciate their loved ones and to care for those who care for them. We spoiled her Jaddah with a lovely Jummuah lunch followed by a mani and pedi for Arwa and her grandmother. She lasted all of two minutes on her mani but her heart was so incredibly happy to serve her beloved. She kept racing around the house telling my friend Aunty Sharon exactly how to do her job! The day flew past with little Arwa Hannah bringing everything possible for her grandmother: my goal was to teach her how to show appreciation and to understand the joy of nurturing others. The world teaches us to want a day that makes us super special and focus on getting rather than giving. And yet it is in taking care of others, in taking joy in nurturing that we find both healing as well as growth.
The next day we had a fun ride through Johannesburg on the red bus and we had a cake that had as many sweets, donuts, and cupcakes as it could hold! Early that morning my little two-year-old helped me prepare padkos boxes for her cousins. She was simply itching to eat all the treats up – but slowly she worked with me, putting in milkshakes, packets of crisps, and yummy sandwiches. She nearly broke when she saw the cake popsicles – but as we worked I explained to her how we would enter Jannah if we fed others and how we would be so happy should we make others happy. For the adults we made croissants and I told her all about each of her aunts and uncles and the way they loved her- I drew her attention to the gifts they had given her and the terms of endearment they all used for her.
The focus throughout each moment was to build qadr. To build her understanding of the loved ones around us and to understand the great role each person plays in our lives. As we grow up in a world that celebrates the “I” and “my” – my goal each year is for myself and my children to learn the beauty of Islam in that we are strong because of the bonds that we form.
في الصحيحين عن ابن عمر ـ رضي الله عنهما ـ
عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم أنه قال: من كان في حاجة أخيه كان الله في حاجته’
NARRATED BY IBN UMAR رضي الله عنه FROM THE HOLY PROPHET صلى الله عليه وسلم:
WHOEVER FULFILLS THE NEEDS OF HIS BROTHER (A FELLOW MUSLIM) ALLAH WILL FULFILL HIS NEEDS.
وفي الصحيح من حديث أبي هريرة ـ رضي الله عنه ـ عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم أنه قال: والله في عون العبد ما كان العبد في عون أخيه
NARRATED FROM ABU HURAIRAH رضي الله عنه FROM THE HOLY PROPHET صلى الله عليه وسلم
ALLAH REMAINS IN THE ASSISTANCE OF THE SERVANT SO LONG AS THE SERVANT IS IN THE ASSISTANCE OF HIS BROTHER (FELLOW MUSLIM).
و قال صلى الله عليه وسلم: من عاد مريضا أو زار أخا له في الله ناداه مناد أن طبت وطاب ممشاك وتبوأت من الجنة منزلا. رواه الترمذي
ABU HURAIRAH (MAY ALLAH BE PLEASED WITH HIM) REPORTED:I HEARD MESSENGER OF ALLAH (ﷺ) SAYING, “WHOSOEVER VISITS AN AILING PERSON OR A BROTHER OF HIS TO SEEK THE PLEASURE OF ALLAH, AN ANNOUNCER (ANGEL) CALLS OUT: ‘MAY YOU BE HAPPY, MAY YOUR WALKING BE BLESSED, AND MAY YOU BE AWARDED A DIGNIFIED POSITION IN JANNAH”.
Research has shown that giving a gift to someone else has been linked to increased self-esteem, self-worth, and feelings of social connection with the recipient. Even among animals, caretaking behaviors, such as grooming, can be linked to lower stress levels and fewer anxiety-related behaviors. In an experiment conducted by Inagaki and Naomi Eisenberger (University of California, Los Angeles), participants wrote either a supportive note to a friend in need or wrote about a neutral topic. Those who thought they were helping out a friend benefited by a reduction in stress. Consistent with these findings, an intervention outside the lab showed that being randomly assigned to give money to others (versus spending money on oneself) led to lower resting blood pressure. “In addition to the short-term benefits reviewed here, we expect benefits of giving support to extend to long-term well-being,” Inagaki and Orehek write. “Indeed, large-scale analyses of human social ties have demonstrated remarkable health-promotion effects: Parenthood, marriage, and social integration are all robustly associated with greater longevity.” reference: Benefits of Giving Social Support: When, Why, and How Support Providers Gain by Caring for Others. Current Directions in Psychological Science
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