The Believer’s Natural Inclination to Maintain Family Ties

Early Morning Reflections

The Believer’s Natural Inclination to Maintain Family Ties

وَجَآءَ إِخْوَةُ يُوسُفَ فَدَخَلُوا۟ عَلَيْهِ فَعَرَفَهُمْ وَهُمْ لَهُۥ مُنكِرُونَ ٥٨

“And Joseph’s brothers came and entered his presence. He recognised them but they were unaware of who he really was.” (12:58)

Yusuf (AS) made it so that the system he crafted included everyone; it was equal for the poor and the wealthy. He did not allow the grains to be hoarded by a few, and rather than looking only for the benefit of Egypt, he worried for the surrounding areas, which would affect Egypt in the long-term.

• Such was Yusuf (AS)’s concern for this responsibility, that he personally used to oversee the sale of foodgrains. In his leadership are lessons of ‘Adl (‘justice’) and responsibility.
• When looking at this leadership style of Yusuf (AS), how is the believer adapting it in their own lives?
• Yusuf (AS) during this time was known as a man of mercy. And yet many a time when one thinks of leadership, they think of hardness.
• Leadership, however, does not have to be a style that breaks others and pushes them away. Yusuf (AS) was steadfast in his strictness for the foodgrain matter, but also merciful.

وَلَمَّا جَهَّزَهُم بِجَهَازِهِمْ قَالَ ٱئْتُونِى بِأَخٍۢ لَّكُم مِّنْ أَبِيكُمْ ۚ أَلَا تَرَوْنَ أَنِّىٓ أُوفِى ٱلْكَيْلَ وَأَنَا۠ خَيْرُ ٱلْمُنزِلِينَ ٥٩

“When he had provided them with their supplies, he demanded, “Bring me your brother on your father’s side. Do you not see that I give full measure and I am the best of hosts?” (12:59)

In this event when Yusuf (AS) asked his brothers many questions to have them reveal the full story, is a lesson that all people have their own versions of the truth

Sometimes the believer will go through the most difficult tests in life, yet the people around them speak of these events completely differently. People will explain away a test one has gone through, minimise, or even contest one’s experiences.

Yusuf (AS) treated his brothers as royal guests despite what they had done to him as a young boy, showing us that the believer should never allow the rudeness, hardness, and bad qualities of others to move them away from the life of Ihsan, kindness, and goodness they are trying to follow.

• No matter how much his family broke him, Yusuf (AS) had the natural inclination to see them again.
• The focus is to continue to make Allah a priority in a relationship even when one is being treated in the worst of ways.
• The believer’s test is that even when going through the most toxic relationships, Allah has made it that He put a natural love for one’s family in their hearts.
• Irrespective of one’s own desires, Nafs, and hurt, the believer should always follow the Sunnah–to do what is pleasing for Allah.

Sayyidina Anas ibn Malik (RA) reports that Muhammad (SAW) said:

“Join ties with those who cut off ties with you and pardon those who oppress you.”

وَلَمَّا فَتَحُوا۟ مَتَـٰعَهُمْ وَجَدُوا۟ بِضَـٰعَتَهُمْ رُدَّتْ إِلَيْهِمْ ۖ قَالُوا۟ يَـٰٓأَبَانَا مَا نَبْغِى ۖ هَـٰذِهِۦ بِضَـٰعَتُنَا رُدَّتْ إِلَيْنَا ۖ وَنَمِيرُ أَهْلَنَا وَنَحْفَظُ أَخَانَا وَنَزْدَادُ كَيْلَ بَعِيرٍۢ ۖ ذَٰلِكَ كَيْلٌۭ يَسِيرٌۭ ٦٥

“When they opened their bags, they discovered that their money had been returned to them. They argued, “O our father! What more can we ask for? Here is our money, fully returned to us. Now we can buy more food for our family. We will watch over our brother, and obtain an extra camel-load of grain. That load can be easily secured.”” (12:65)

According to many, the sons of Yaqub (AS) committed many great sins. However, Yaqub (AS) did not separate from them. Despite their crimes, he still treated them with good.

• When one’s children make mistakes, it is the responsibility of the father to seek their correction through appropriate education and training, as long as there is hope of betterment; let him not sever his relationship with them.
• Never write people off. Allah has the ability to change anyone’s situation.
• When admonishing one’s bad behaviour, they should also be given a feeling of a fresh chance by forgoing what has gone before.
• Yaqub (AS) placed his trust not on any person, but on Allah only.